Wednesday, August 4, 2010
A Fair Exchange
Where can you get a full day's worth of concentrated Americana for just $12? Why, a State Fair, of course! TSG cruised up to Sacto last weekend and had a great time immersing ourselves in the quintessential summer event. Though not as awesome as the Iowa State Fair, the grounds of Cal Expo hosted numerous enjoyable and bizarre attractions...
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Having myself personally attended the Iowa State Fair, I have to say that this Golden State affair is not wanting in any way! Presuming that this Fair had its requisite share of vomit-inducing (and laden) rides as well as cheesy gaming opportunities, it seems every bit the equal of a top contender in these regards.
If nothing else, I am quite certain that sturgeon petting is not even LEGAL in Iowa, hence given this California Fair an immediate leg up.
And in Iowa, let me tell you, the shit collectors would NOT be sporting such spotless and classically-white T-shirts as the competitor in your photo! That fellow is no doubt destined to appear on the cover of Shit Collector Digest's Man-of-the-Year issue!
NPR recently did a spot on . . . the Iowa State Fair! Spotlighting, in particular, the unbelievable number of foods on a stick that one could obtain there. For the sake of nerdish completeness, those foods include:
1. Fair Square
2. Chocolate-covered tiramisu on-a-stick
3. Turtle mousse bar on-a-stick
4. Strawberry cream bar on-a-stick
5. Twinkie log on-a-stick (frozen Twinkie dipped in white chocolate and rolled in cashews)
6. Octodog (hotdog in the shape of an octopus
7. Frozen s’more on-a-stick
8. Chocolate-dipped cake on-a-stick
9. Chicken club on-a-stick
10. Buffalo chicken on-a-stick
11. Chocolate-covered peanut butter round on-a-stick
12. Chocolate-covered key lime round on-a-stick
13. Carmellows on-a-stick
14. Pretzel rods dipped in caramel or chocolate
15. Pickle on-a-stick
16. Pork chop on-a-stick
17. Corn dog
18. Cheese on-a-stick
19. Cajun chicken on-a-stick
20. Sesame chicken on-a-stick
21. Carmel apple
22. German sausage on-a-stick
23. Teriyaki beef on-a-stick
24. Corn on the cob on-a-stick
25. Cotton candy
26. Veggie dog on-a-stick
27. Turkey drumstick
28. Nutty bar
29. Fried pickle on-a-stick
30. Hot bologna on-a-stick
31. Shrimp on-a-stick
32. Chicken on-a-stick
33. Monkey Tails (chocolate covered banana on-a-stick)
34. Taffy on-a-stick
35. Honey on-a-stick
36. Ice cream Wonder Bar
37. Deep fried Snickers bar on-a-stick
38. Deep fried 3 Musketeers bar on-a-stick
39. Deep fried Milky Way bar on-a-stick
40. Deep fried Twinkie on-a-stick
41. Lamb on-a-stick
42. Meatballs on-a-stick
43. Deep fried hoho on-a-stick
44. Fudge Puppy (waffle drenched in chocolate syrup and topped with whipped cream)
45. Chili Dog on-a-stick
46. Funtastick Pork on-a-stick
47. Dutch letters on-a-stick
48. Turkey tenders on-a-stick
49. Deep fried hot dog on-a-stick
50. Chocolate covered cheesecake on-a-stick
51. Potato Lollipop (4 thick slices of russet potato deep fried and on-a-stick with dipping sauces)
52. Pineapple on-a-stick (Fresh pineapple dipped in funnel cake batter and deep fried)
53. Chicken lips on-a-stick (breaded chicken breast smothered with hot sauce, served with blue cheese dressing).
54. Cornbrat on-a-stick (bratwurst dipped in corndog batter)
55. Frozen fudge brownie on-a-stick
56. Ice cream cookie sandwich on-a-stick
57. Rock candy on-a-stick
58. Salad on-a-stick
59. Hard-boiled egg on-a-stick
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